This is my personal thoughts, opinions and musings place. I will also rant about things, especially politically-correct things that irritate me. And sci-fi. Did I mention sci-fi? There'll be lots of sci-fi stuff here. And movies, too. Mmmmm... Movies

Saturday, June 11, 2005

A new element has been discovered

Governmentium

A major research institution has recently announced the discovery of
the heaviest element yet known to science. The new element has been
named "Governmentium." Governmentium has one neutron, 12 assistant neutrons, 75
deputy neutrons, and 224 assistant deputy neutrons,
giving it an atomic mass of 312.

These 312 particles are held together by forces called morons, which
are surrounded by vast quantities of lepton-like particles called
peons. Since Governmentium has no electrons, it is inert. However,
it can be detected, because it impedes every reaction with which it
comes into contact. A minute amount of Governmentium causes one reaction to
take over four days to complete, when it would normally take less than a second.

Governmentium has a normal half-life of 4 years; it does not decay, but
instead undergoes a reorganization in which a portion of the assistant
neutrons and deputy neutrons exchange places. In fact,
governmentium's mass will actually increase over time, since each
reorganization will cause more morons to become neutrons, forming
isodopes.

This characteristic of moron promotion leads some scientists to believe
that Governmentium is formed whenever morons reach a certain quantity
in concentration. This hypothetical quantity is referred to as
"Critical Morass." When catalyzed with money, Governmentium becomes
Administratium - an element which radiates just as much energy as the
Governmentium, since it has half as many peons but twice as many
morons.

0 Comments:

Post a Comment

|

Links to this post:

Create a Link

 

Copyright © 2005 Yury D.   All Rights Reserved